Friday, November 30, 2007
PARIS BY NIGHT
The trip to the very top of the Eiffel Tower is a somewhat expensive one, and yet it is the best value your money buy. And you must go on a clear night, an hour before closing for two reasons: firstly, you miss any lines. Secondly, on a clear night you can see why they call it "The City of Lights," and why every generation of travellers falls in love anew.
The trip will take place in two stages - the first, in a rickety red lift. As you slowly click your way up the first two stages, you will be reminded over and over again that your life lies in the hands of that famous French engineering. This will be of no comfort.
The second part of your journey involves a trip on a whole other lift, and this is like being whisked up and up, into the skies over France, like in Willy Wonka's flying glass elevator.
Paris is the most beautiful city I've ever been in, and that's no joke. It's a shame it's filled with so many French people.
More pictures later, and i know I owe you guys pictures/stories from London, Edinburgh, and Glasgow. patience my pretties, patience.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
SUNSET ON THE SEINE
Today, I was walking down a street in Paris when a camera crew approached me, stuck a mic in my face. A French journalist (I'm guessing) asked me a lengthy question in French, then looked at me expectantly for an answer.
Not knowing what to say, I replied, "SOUTH SIDE DETROIT REPRESENT!" And threw some gang signs.
So if you're watching the French Evening News tonight, look out for that.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
BONJOUR!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
PICTURES FROM DUBLIN
I know I haven't been writing much, and sorry. But if a picture is worth a thousand words, then this post is my A La Recherche du Temps (literal translation: "Just Like A Legal Secretary"). The following are some pictures from Ireland, and you can click on them to make them (much) larger:
* * * * *
O'Connell Street, where the bus from the airport lets you off:
"Welcome to Dublin, you fuckin' fuck."
* * * * *
Outside McDaid's, where Behan drank:
"His children had to search fifteen pubs to roll him home."
* * * * *
Irish women are mean. And I was talking to a guy and I said exactly that to him, and he said, kind of angry, "What do you mean by that?" And I said, "Exactly what I said, they're angry and sharp and have no patience and say only the cruelest things they can think of."
And he said, "Oh, you've met my mother."
* * * * *
The jay-walking is crazy, and that's coming from a guy who grew up a block from "The Boulevard of Death." In Dublin, green means "walk," and red means "run":
* * * * *
From O'Connell Bridge:
* * * * *
A fellow tourist, looking as lost as I feel:
* * * * *
A friend's house in Dublin. Please note the room's centerpiece:
* * * * *
Yes, this is a real restaurant:
Their motto: "We're not as happy to serve you as you think."
* * * * *
Scenes from the River Liffey:
* * * * *
From Dublin Castle:
* * * * *
Scenes from Monkstown on the Shore:
* * * * *
Pictures from London soon, I promise...
|
O'Connell Street, where the bus from the airport lets you off:
Outside McDaid's, where Behan drank:
Irish women are mean. And I was talking to a guy and I said exactly that to him, and he said, kind of angry, "What do you mean by that?" And I said, "Exactly what I said, they're angry and sharp and have no patience and say only the cruelest things they can think of."
And he said, "Oh, you've met my mother."
The jay-walking is crazy, and that's coming from a guy who grew up a block from "The Boulevard of Death." In Dublin, green means "walk," and red means "run":
From O'Connell Bridge:
A fellow tourist, looking as lost as I feel:
A friend's house in Dublin. Please note the room's centerpiece:
Yes, this is a real restaurant:
Scenes from the River Liffey:
From Dublin Castle:
Scenes from Monkstown on the Shore:
Pictures from London soon, I promise...
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Flying Into Ireland
The first piece of advice I would give to anyone flying AerLingus, Ireland’s official airline, is that you must must must make sure that you check in through their website the night before. If not, if you wait until you’re at the airport, you will find yourself among the scene the I found myself witnessing at the airline: a long line, stretching around the “Self-Service Check-In” kiosks, of disappointed Irishmen-and-women, staring grimly at the group of baggage-laden families in front of them, all thinking the same thing I thought when I approached: “Here I am, two-and-a-half hours early, and I might miss my flight.”
However, I quickly discovered that since I had done the on-line check-in, I wasn’t waiting on linel I stood in the Web Check-In line and was the next to have my baggage weighed and tagged, and my boarding pass issued. However, this led me to a longer, more serious line – the line to get through security; and really, airport security seems more designed to protect airplanes from their paying passengers than terrorism. The passport clearance procedure was this: two young women sitting at dirty card table, examing passports slowly and carefully, as the line stretched seventy-five deep into the heart of the food court that makes the lower level of JFK airport’s Terminal 4.
The trip through the actual security was relatively quick, thanks to the dogged efforts of these two young women to keep passengers from taxing the X-Ray machine.
Sitting in the gate, waiting for my flight to board, I sat a foot away from the public phones, and was witness to a conversation that, if I had heard it in a movie about the drama of Irish émigrés, would have found it intolerably clichéd: a stout woman, ruddy-faced, red-haired, with a brogue tempered by years of living in Queens, crying into the phone, saying, “I want to stay with you. I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to leave.” This by itself would have been unremarkable, but it was what she said next that made it so Irish drama-cartoonish that if I had been watching this scene on TV, I would have flipped over for the baseball scores in disgust: She quickly collected herself, then said calmly, “How are you? Listen, I don’t want you to cry, okay? You have to be strong, because you’re in charge of the babies, alright? … How are you Rose? Staying out of trouble, are ya darlin’? Listen, if you have any problems, call Anna. Yes, she’s in the book.” And with little else, she hung up and walked away, crying softly. A scene that touching and melodramatic would have lined the bottom of a Hollywood screenwriting hack’s waste basket, and yet it’s one that is probably played out hundreds of times over the course of the day in every airport in every language around the world.
* * * * *
The upholstery and the dresses of AerLingus all of one color: green, as if to say, “You’ll find no Protestant traitors here. If you want that, go fly AerCromwell.”
The odd thing about most airplanes is that, even though smoking has been banned on flights for about twenty years now, they all still come equipped with No Smoking signs that light up, as if waiting for the glorious day when the lawmakers of the civilized world all one day come to their senses, and repeal these antismoking laws, and we can have a return to that glorious time when you were stuck aboard a small confined space choked with grey layers and the yellow sweat of nicotine.
Five more hours and I land in Shannon. I transfer at Shannon for Dublin. As I doze at the window, I look out over the waking green land, green and lush. I see the sun rising in the east over Ireland. It’s trapped behind a bank of clouds, and it turns these clouds an angry orange. It looks as if, in the distance, a volcano has erupted, or an island has caught fire. It is beautiful. It is foreign-yet-familiar. It is Ireland.
|
However, I quickly discovered that since I had done the on-line check-in, I wasn’t waiting on linel I stood in the Web Check-In line and was the next to have my baggage weighed and tagged, and my boarding pass issued. However, this led me to a longer, more serious line – the line to get through security; and really, airport security seems more designed to protect airplanes from their paying passengers than terrorism. The passport clearance procedure was this: two young women sitting at dirty card table, examing passports slowly and carefully, as the line stretched seventy-five deep into the heart of the food court that makes the lower level of JFK airport’s Terminal 4.
The trip through the actual security was relatively quick, thanks to the dogged efforts of these two young women to keep passengers from taxing the X-Ray machine.
Sitting in the gate, waiting for my flight to board, I sat a foot away from the public phones, and was witness to a conversation that, if I had heard it in a movie about the drama of Irish émigrés, would have found it intolerably clichéd: a stout woman, ruddy-faced, red-haired, with a brogue tempered by years of living in Queens, crying into the phone, saying, “I want to stay with you. I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to leave.” This by itself would have been unremarkable, but it was what she said next that made it so Irish drama-cartoonish that if I had been watching this scene on TV, I would have flipped over for the baseball scores in disgust: She quickly collected herself, then said calmly, “How are you? Listen, I don’t want you to cry, okay? You have to be strong, because you’re in charge of the babies, alright? … How are you Rose? Staying out of trouble, are ya darlin’? Listen, if you have any problems, call Anna. Yes, she’s in the book.” And with little else, she hung up and walked away, crying softly. A scene that touching and melodramatic would have lined the bottom of a Hollywood screenwriting hack’s waste basket, and yet it’s one that is probably played out hundreds of times over the course of the day in every airport in every language around the world.
* * * * *
The upholstery and the dresses of AerLingus all of one color: green, as if to say, “You’ll find no Protestant traitors here. If you want that, go fly AerCromwell.”
The odd thing about most airplanes is that, even though smoking has been banned on flights for about twenty years now, they all still come equipped with No Smoking signs that light up, as if waiting for the glorious day when the lawmakers of the civilized world all one day come to their senses, and repeal these antismoking laws, and we can have a return to that glorious time when you were stuck aboard a small confined space choked with grey layers and the yellow sweat of nicotine.
Five more hours and I land in Shannon. I transfer at Shannon for Dublin. As I doze at the window, I look out over the waking green land, green and lush. I see the sun rising in the east over Ireland. It’s trapped behind a bank of clouds, and it turns these clouds an angry orange. It looks as if, in the distance, a volcano has erupted, or an island has caught fire. It is beautiful. It is foreign-yet-familiar. It is Ireland.
Friday, November 02, 2007
FARE THE WELL MY HONEY,
FARE THEE WELL MY ONLY TRUE LOVE
"IT WAS A BABY!!!"... And with those words, Hawkeye Pierce bid adieu to the Korean War, the funniest, most heart-warming war in America's history. (TV wouldn't see another war that simultaneously sad and hilarious until Star Jones' final week on The View. Bing bong!)
And in a very similar way, I am bidding adieu to New York City; but not to worry, because even though this coming Monday will see me winging my way over the Atlantic Ocean, Tell Your Friends! will still continue its tradition of bringing high-class comedy at lowbrow prices. This is thanks to my friends Kambri Crews and Molly Mandel, who will be producing the show in my absence.
However, not to worry; I'm bringing my laptop along, so not only will I continue to post on this blog, but I'm going to be sharing stories about my adventures around the world. On my e-mail list; if you're not subscribed to my e-mail list, just drop me a line at mceneaneyl (at) aol.com. So please continue to check this space for the best show in New York City... and beyond. (And if you missed the big show at Karma, or just want to relive it, you can find pictures here.)
Meanwhile, please come out this Monday and check out this fantastic lineup:
Monday, November 5th
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!
at the Lolita Bar
266 Broome St., corner of Allen
8:00pm - $5.00
WITH YOUR HOST: Michelle Collins - from VH1's hit show Best Week Ever
AND:
Brian Kiley
is a writer for NBC's Late Night w/ Conan O'Brien, which I understand is big with the kids. He's also done standup on Late Night, The Late Show w/ David Letterman, The Tonight Show w/ Jay Leno, and his own half-hour Comedy Central Presents: Brian Kiley special.
Amanda Melson
is a writer for VH1's Best Week Ever, and has appeared on Comedy Central's Live at Gotham.
Todd Levin
has appeared on Comedy Central's Premium Blend, and his writings have appeared in The Modern Humorist, The Onion, GQ, Glamour, and Jest magazines.
Shayna Ferm
is a newcomer to TYF!, but not comedy. She has played venues like Joe’s Pub, The Knitting Factory, Mercury Lounge, Ars Nova, and Moonwork.
and of course, our house band, A Brief View of the Hudson
Produced by Kambri Crews, Molly Mandel, Liam McEneaney
WHAT THE PRESS HAS SAID ABOUT "TELL YOUR FRIENDS!"
* Time Out New York called it a "DON'T MISS" several times, and said: "With a slew of talented stand-ups . . . and folk-rock duo 'A Brief View of the Hudson,' Liam McEneaney's new show—and 'workout comedy room'—is sure to please."
* The NY Daily News made it a Monday pick of the day.
* AM New York put it in their "Best Bets" section.
* The Onion says, "Though it's pegged as a 'workout room' for comics to test new material, Liam McEneaney's weekly show Tell Your Friends flexes enough comedic muscle to pull more than its weight alongside other downtown shows. Demetri Martin, Jim Gaffigan, and The Daily Show's John Oliver are among the stand-ups who have squeezed into Lolita's narrow space during the show's two-year run, alongside the surprisingly tolerable resident folk duo A Brief View of the Hudson... (and) a slew of acts likely worth crowding into a hallway-sized room for."
* "It's been a while since we wrote about Tell Your Friends but this weekly comedy series deserves a nod. Every Monday they belt out top notch comedy at rock bottom prices with performers who have appeared on Comedy Central, Conan O'Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, and more." - FreeNYC.net
* "'Tell Your Friends!' This, the well-earned title of Lolita Bar's upcoming comedy show, rings true for anyone looking for a good time and great comedy... (The comedians') collective resume spans Comedy Central, including "The Daily Show," "Premium Blend" and "Live at Gotham." They are simply some of the best club comedians in America today." - The Times Herald-Record (Upstate NY)
ABOUT OUR HOUSE BAND
A Brief View of the Hudson is a folk-rock duo that blows away audiences at every show they play.
Here's what the press has said:
* "BEST FOLK DUO"
"It's rare that we like a band from the first chord. Yet the first time we saw folk duo A Brief View of the Hudson play at the Bowery Poetry Club we were hooked.
"Ann Enzminger and Nicholas Nace incorporate many of the best characteristics of both country music and classic rock without sounding derivative...Enzminger is a tiny woman, a hair taller than five feet, but with an opera-trained voice as big and sweet as a bowling ball–size Hershey Kiss. Nace's twangy talk-singing adds a quirky and ear-catching roughness; we crave the combination time and again." - The NY Press
* "It is not often that a band sounds like nothing you've ever heard & still sounds good. That's what you get from A Brief View of the Hudson." - The NY Sun
* "A Brief View of the Hudson features Ann Enzminger's arrestingly powerful vocals, which are well tuned to the duo's graceful songs of indie-folk heartbreak." -Time Out NY
|
And in a very similar way, I am bidding adieu to New York City; but not to worry, because even though this coming Monday will see me winging my way over the Atlantic Ocean, Tell Your Friends! will still continue its tradition of bringing high-class comedy at lowbrow prices. This is thanks to my friends Kambri Crews and Molly Mandel, who will be producing the show in my absence.
However, not to worry; I'm bringing my laptop along, so not only will I continue to post on this blog, but I'm going to be sharing stories about my adventures around the world. On my e-mail list; if you're not subscribed to my e-mail list, just drop me a line at mceneaneyl (at) aol.com. So please continue to check this space for the best show in New York City... and beyond. (And if you missed the big show at Karma, or just want to relive it, you can find pictures here.)
Meanwhile, please come out this Monday and check out this fantastic lineup:
Monday, November 5th
TELL YOUR FRIENDS!
at the Lolita Bar
266 Broome St., corner of Allen
8:00pm - $5.00
WITH YOUR HOST: Michelle Collins - from VH1's hit show Best Week Ever
AND:
Brian Kiley
is a writer for NBC's Late Night w/ Conan O'Brien, which I understand is big with the kids. He's also done standup on Late Night, The Late Show w/ David Letterman, The Tonight Show w/ Jay Leno, and his own half-hour Comedy Central Presents: Brian Kiley special.
Amanda Melson
is a writer for VH1's Best Week Ever, and has appeared on Comedy Central's Live at Gotham.
Todd Levin
has appeared on Comedy Central's Premium Blend, and his writings have appeared in The Modern Humorist, The Onion, GQ, Glamour, and Jest magazines.
Shayna Ferm
is a newcomer to TYF!, but not comedy. She has played venues like Joe’s Pub, The Knitting Factory, Mercury Lounge, Ars Nova, and Moonwork.
and of course, our house band, A Brief View of the Hudson
Produced by Kambri Crews, Molly Mandel, Liam McEneaney
WHAT THE PRESS HAS SAID ABOUT "TELL YOUR FRIENDS!"
* Time Out New York called it a "DON'T MISS" several times, and said: "With a slew of talented stand-ups . . . and folk-rock duo 'A Brief View of the Hudson,' Liam McEneaney's new show—and 'workout comedy room'—is sure to please."
* The NY Daily News made it a Monday pick of the day.
* AM New York put it in their "Best Bets" section.
* The Onion says, "Though it's pegged as a 'workout room' for comics to test new material, Liam McEneaney's weekly show Tell Your Friends flexes enough comedic muscle to pull more than its weight alongside other downtown shows. Demetri Martin, Jim Gaffigan, and The Daily Show's John Oliver are among the stand-ups who have squeezed into Lolita's narrow space during the show's two-year run, alongside the surprisingly tolerable resident folk duo A Brief View of the Hudson... (and) a slew of acts likely worth crowding into a hallway-sized room for."
* "It's been a while since we wrote about Tell Your Friends but this weekly comedy series deserves a nod. Every Monday they belt out top notch comedy at rock bottom prices with performers who have appeared on Comedy Central, Conan O'Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, and more." - FreeNYC.net
* "'Tell Your Friends!' This, the well-earned title of Lolita Bar's upcoming comedy show, rings true for anyone looking for a good time and great comedy... (The comedians') collective resume spans Comedy Central, including "The Daily Show," "Premium Blend" and "Live at Gotham." They are simply some of the best club comedians in America today." - The Times Herald-Record (Upstate NY)
ABOUT OUR HOUSE BAND
A Brief View of the Hudson is a folk-rock duo that blows away audiences at every show they play.
Here's what the press has said:
* "BEST FOLK DUO"
"It's rare that we like a band from the first chord. Yet the first time we saw folk duo A Brief View of the Hudson play at the Bowery Poetry Club we were hooked.
"Ann Enzminger and Nicholas Nace incorporate many of the best characteristics of both country music and classic rock without sounding derivative...Enzminger is a tiny woman, a hair taller than five feet, but with an opera-trained voice as big and sweet as a bowling ball–size Hershey Kiss. Nace's twangy talk-singing adds a quirky and ear-catching roughness; we crave the combination time and again." - The NY Press
* "It is not often that a band sounds like nothing you've ever heard & still sounds good. That's what you get from A Brief View of the Hudson." - The NY Sun
* "A Brief View of the Hudson features Ann Enzminger's arrestingly powerful vocals, which are well tuned to the duo's graceful songs of indie-folk heartbreak." -Time Out NY
